I Don't Want to Have Kids Because I'm Shy

 

I always say that there are dozens of reasons why I chose to remain childfree, and, just when I think I've considered each and every one of them percolating somewhere inside me, I come across yet another.

In this BuzzFeed collection of people "Getting Brutally Honest About Whether or Not They Regret Their Decision to Have (or Not Have) Children," I read the following contribution from Sharon W.:

I am an extreme introvert, and the sheer amount of forced interaction with others (teachers, doctors, other parents) that having a child would require would be painful to me.

And this from Margaret A.:

I'm 75, and I chose not to have children for several reasons: I am an introvert and a bookworm. I need peace, quiet, and alone time for the sake of my mental health. 

These comments resonate strongly with me. I am a very shy person — an awkward introvert who is constitutionally anxious. I really like people, and my partner often jokes that, if you lose track of me at the grocery store, you'll find me talking to an employee who's halfway through telling me their life story. But, as much as I love interacting with people, social activity is overstimulating and draining for me. I like downtime, quiet time, after socializing.

And, generally, I like a quiet home. I like tidiness and routine. I'm organized and stoic. I don't always do well navigating disruption. 

I'm sure there are parents who would describe themselves the same way and have figured out how to integrate children seamlessly into that sort of life, but it's not for me.

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